Radnorite

Florida Man Supports Reopening, Loves Catching “Rad” Coronavirus Waves

Florida Man Supports Reopening, Loves Catching “Rad” Coronavirus Waves

Mohen Li, The Radish Associate Editor

July 3, 2020

MIAMI--Brett Markey, a 23-year-old Florida native, enthusiastically praised Florida Governor Ron DeSantis’s refusal to return to quarantine amid surging coronavirus cases. “Brah, I’m glad my dude Ronny is really sticking up for people like me, and that’s why I voted him into office,” Marke...

RTSD Refuses to Change Mascot Until They Have Unanimous Support from Wealthy Caucasian Main Line Citizens

RTSD Refuses to Change Mascot Until They Have Unanimous Support from Wealthy Caucasian Main Line Citizens

Andrew Rosin, The Radish Editor

July 1, 2020

Acknowledging the recent movement to change Radnor’s mascot, Radnor Township School District countered that the lack of outcry from the privileged white inhabitants of Radnor precluded the abolition of the Raider. “While we kind of value the opinions of Radnor’s indigenous community, we cannot...

“On the Birthday of the Constitution, We Have to Remember That It Is Very Old”

Andrew Rosin, The Radish Editor

June 23, 2020

(June 21) On the anniversary of the ratification of the Constitution, President Donald Trump delivered an Oval Office address in which he claimed that the historic document was outdated and archaic. “When James Madison wrote the freedom of assembly clause in 1787, he could not have predicted that c...

Teacher’s Union Celebrates As Annual Salary Finally Surpasses National Average

Teacher’s Union Celebrates As Annual Salary Finally Surpasses National Average

Andrew Rosin, The Radish Editor

June 10, 2020

For the first time in 87 school years, the average salary of America’s teachers eclipsed the average income of individuals in the United States. “It took 39 million people losing their jobs for teachers’ to earn equitable pay,” commented the President of the American Federation of Teachers, Randi W...

The Return of the Bullies

The Return of the Bullies

Gerry Atkinson

May 31, 2020

When schools were closed down and quarantine began I was overjoyed. I definitely miss some of my classmates, my friends, Mr. Busza, randomly sitting on the floor in the middle of class when sitting in a chair gets boring, and the general Radnor High School community, but I still think quarantine is a d...

RHS Administration Announces New Junior Book Awards for the 2020-2021 School Year

RHS Administration Announces New Junior Book Awards for the 2020-2021 School Year

Mohen Li, The Radish Associate Editor

May 21, 2020

The RHS Administration announced yesterday that they would like to honor next year's juniors in light of a challenging and uncertain upcoming school year.

Tech Department: “Surface Go’s Are Definitely Supposed to Do That”

“It states that these Surface Gos are flammable in Section 132.009 b. of the owner’s manual, which apparently were never delivered to students because they got lost in the mail.” --Victoria Glatzer, RHS Instructional Technology Consultant

Andrew Rosin, The Radish Editor

May 18, 2020

Two weeks after a student’s Surface Go tablet caught on fire, a panicking RTSD technology department released a press statement in which they claimed that the Surface Go's are “100% definitely supposed to do that.” The press release included a potentially edited image of the Surface Go’s pac...

The Easter Bunny on the Hop

Photo Taken by Ellie Davis

Ellie Davis and Reese Hillman

May 8, 2020

For the past three weeks, law enforcement officials have been facing an unprecedented challenge: tracking down the Easter Bunny.   On Saturday, April 11th, to the delight of Radnor families, the Easter Bunny traveled throughout our town atop a fire truck. With the sound of the siren, the whirl of ...

Blowing Up The Kremlin Among Series of Inventive Tasks on This Year’s AP Exams

Blowing Up The Kremlin Among Series of Inventive Tasks on This Year’s AP Exams

Andrew Rosin, The Radish Editor

May 5, 2020

With the AP exams just one week away, the College Board recently announced their adapted testing policy in response to the Coronavirus pandemic. The open ended questions on this year’s exams will be nearly unsolvable, as they require obtaining information from sources that are either “one-of-a-kin...

Trump Blames Hillary Clinton for Coronavirus

Trump Blames Hillary Clinton for Coronavirus

Sammy Rosin

April 30, 2020

When something goes wrong in the United States whose fault is it? President Trump and the GOP knew the answer back in 2016, and they know the answer now: everything is Hillary Clinton's fault, including Covid-19. Trump said, “At first I didn't believe it because I did not think a woman could spread ...

Administration: People Will Die In This Year’s Senior Assassin Game

Administration: People Will Die In This Year's Senior Assassin Game

Andrew Rosin, The Radish Editor

April 21, 2020

Radnor, PA--The 2020 Senior Assassin game will not be canceled, according to the Radnor High School Administration. As seniors cope with potentially losing prom and graduation, the administration jumped in to explain that this year’s assassin game will proceed as planned and be the most realistic to da...

Six RHS Students Tried for Truancy in District Court

The courtroom sketch from the students' trial.

Ellie Davis

April 10, 2020

As recently reported by The Radish in Nick Sparanza’s article, New RHS Attendance Policies Leaked, the district found a record-high fifty RHS Students truant during the past two weeks of online attendance. Because Radnor strives for excellence, even amidst the pandemic, at a very minimum all students sh...

Trump Seen Smuggling Toilet Paper into Whitehouse Just Moments After Criticizing Hoarders

Trump Seen Smuggling Toilet Paper into Whitehouse Just Moments After Criticizing Hoarders

Anya Chan

April 6, 2020

Washington, D.C.---President Donald Trump addressed toilet paper hoarders last night, saying “Everyone needs to calm down. No one needs that much toilet paper, and if you do, we have a problem—probably colitis or diverticulitis or a perianal abscess...Anyway, I myself have two rolls less than I woul...

Sheltering in Place with my Humans

Sheltering in Place with my Humans

Sammy Rosin, Staff Writer

April 4, 2020

My humans complain about sheltering in place for 3 weeks. Well, for those of you who don’t know, in doggy time it’s been almost a  year!  And let me add, I have not had an easy time of it. Humans are a ton of work and a huge nuisance to live with. I love them very much, but a few hours in the morning...

New RHS Attendance Policies Leaked

New RHS Attendance Policies Leaked

Nick Speranza, Radish Staff Writer

April 3, 2020

Late last week, the Radnor High School administration announced via Schoology and student government officers’ Instagram stories that they would begin taking attendance for online classes during the COVID-19 outbreak, requiring all students to sign in once per weekday at some time between 6 AM and 3...

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