Meet the Unusual Suspects

 

Amanda Magen

 

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Name:  Rex Tillerson

Position:  Secretary of State

Height (not including ego):  5’ 8”

Weight (of wallet):  Estimated net worth of $150 million

Experience?:  Good question

Pros:  

Former CEO of ExxonMobile, which is pretty darn successful

Knows Putin

Cons:

No prior experience (but everyone had to start somewhere)

Knows Putin

Closest Secretary of State confirmation vote in over 60 years

Quotes:  

“I’d rather have $7 billion in profit than 7 billion people. 

“Just remember that a pat on the back is 18 inches from a kick in     the behind.”

Fun Fact:  Star sign is Aries

 

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Name:   Reince Priebus

Position:  Chief of Staff

Height:  Not important enough for Google to have the answer

Weight:  165 pounds

Pros:  

Got GOP out of debt after becoming chairman

Looks like Jimmy Fallon

Cons:

Real name is Reinhold so he could have been bullied as a youth and is now out for power and revenge

Quotes:  

“A reporter shoots first, aims later”

“Free enterprise, individual opportunity, limited government.  They keep America great; only they can keep America strong.”

Fun Facts:  

Shares a birthday with Lily Collins

Pro-gay marriage

 

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Name:   Betsy Devos

Position:  Secretary of Education

High:  Probably not shes in an emportent cabinet position

Weight: Its rude to askkk a woman her wait

Experience?:  Depends

Pros:  

Highlight/contour game on point

Eternal optimist (took Trump’s 40% approval rating and still said more than half of the public supports him)

Played by Kate McKinnon on SNL

Cons:  

Yes, several

Fun Fact:  Owns a yacht