As an avid Schoology user, my favorite part of the platform is its unpredictable and exciting updates. Recently, a groundbreaking improvement has arrived: assignments and calendar events are now split into several distinct sidebar sections. The change has been overwhelmingly praised according to a survey of three self-proclaimed Schoology enthusiasts. Utilizing my celebrity status as an obscure Radish writer, I was able to obtain an exclusive interview with the developer responsible for the sidebar-split. 

Hello, and welcome to this exclusive interview. As the readers already know, you coded the entirety of Schoology on a Tuesday afternoon several years ago. And you may be the great mind behind the new and unique sidebar that students are raving about. How does it feel to know that your work is so highly appreciated?

Mr. Krupp: … I didn’t code Schoology.

We are so grateful for what you’ve done. What made you decide to create a separate section for “Recently Completed” assignments?

K: Well, I guess I thought the feature would allow users of the site to know what work they’ve recently completed.

What a brilliant idea. But it seems there’s been a bit of pushback. A couple of utter fools have been complaining that the update is not perfect because upcoming assignments should continue to be grouped by their due dates. I personally disagree with them and believe it would be unnecessary. What’s your response to their deceitful slander and complete dishonesty?

K: I thought the update was pretty nice.

I agree. Unfortunately, we’ve run out of time and the word count of this transcript is getting too high to retain anyone’s attention. We’ll have to conclude this interview now. Any closing words?

K: I didn’t actually code Sch-

[End of Interview]