It all began on a Tuesday night in early September. I was slogging through my not-so-interesting U.S. History homework while listening to Mr. King’s podcast when it hit me: it was time to restore the beloved food review column created by the great Noah Conen. And so, the resurrection of “Grubbin With the Boys” begins with a Delco staple:The Philly Cheesesteak. I rounded up a few of the boys, all of whom I knew were hungry enough to eat and honest enough to judge. To make things easy, each cheesesteak we try is basic, consisting of just bread, meat, and cheese. No toppings, no gimmicks. We picked 4 local spots and addressed our grading scale.

Cheesesteak Grading Scale:

Bread: 1-10

Meat: 1-10

Cheese: 1-10

Overall: 1-10

Each Cheesesteak is broken down into 4 components (bread, meat, cheese, and overall) and will receive a score out of 10.

Judges:

1. Your host and food connoisseur: William Antik
2. Co-star, (AKA the human bowling bowl): Logan Hemcher
3. British lad: Rio Davies
4. Radnor Soccer phenom: Tyler Ferst

Locations:

1. Johnny’s Pizza
2. Bubbas Steaks n Shakes
3. Zestos Grill
4. New Wayne Pizza

Stop #1: Johnny’s Pizza (610-525-4811)

1025 W Lancaster Ave, Bryn Mawr, PA 19010

Logan picked up Rio, Tyler, and me on a Sunday morning, and we headed to Johnny’s. Logan, who claims he is a “regular,” knew exactly when the place opened, so we were the first four to order. Alongside our cheesesteaks, we grabbed a pizza and fries – because why not? Cheesesteaks plus Sunday football is an extremely delightful masculine experience (sorry ladies). If you are wondering how good these steaks were, just know that our plates were clean before any of us had time to blink. Now, to be fair, we had some elevated expectations for Johnny’s (it did not disappoint) when in relation to the opposing restaurants. Appearance wise, Johnny’s seeded roll immediately stood out. The crunchy outside of the seeded roll adds a unique element not usually seen from a cheesesteak. But, the thick-spongy inside of the bread combines nicely with the crispy outside to make a nice one-two punch. The average score for the bread was an 8.3. Solid. Now for my personal favorite part, the cheese. Cooper sharp, obviously, is the only correct choice for a cheesesteak. However, the cheese ratings varied. Logan loved the creamy, fully melted coverage. Rio expected a little more cheese throughout the sandwich, which is fair, because cheese is the most vital component. Overall Johnny’s was magnificent and lived up to the hype. 

Average overall: 8.8

Pizza: 7.6 (We agreed – you do not go to Johnny’s for pizza.)

Fries: 8.8

Rio’s hot take: Snap Pizza is better than Johnny’s Pizza

Stop #2: Bubbas Steaks and Shakes (610-255-2300)

1009 W Lancaster Ave, Bryan Mawr, PA 19010

Thanks to the recent Teacher In-Service Day, the boys and I had the perfect opportunity to continue our mission of finding the best cheesesteak in the area. Our second stop was Bubba’s in Bryn Mawr, located right on Lancaster Avenue, – only about half a block from Johnny’s, making it some close competition (no pun intended). Walking in, I could’ve sworn the guy behind the counter was Tony Soprano himself. Originally, we planned to just grab some steaks, but the over-the-top milkshake menu (specifically the Dubai Chocolate milkshake) quickly caught our attention. So, we splurged. Once we sat down, it was game time. The boys and I immediately noticed that Bubba’s steaks looked similar to those from Johnny’s, but the flavor told a different story. Rio pointed out how chewy the bread was, which made the sandwich tough to bite through. I thought the bread had good flavor, but I have to agree, it seemed a little stale. A fresher roll might’ve bumped up the score. The Cooper Sharp cheese tasted great and paired well with the meat, though it was a little heavy-handed.The meat itself had a unique texture that threw most of us off. Rio, Logan, and I were a little creeped out by it, but Tyler was all in. He liked how the meat stuck to the cheese and called it his favorite part of the sandwich. In the end, the mix of meat, cheese, and bread left us all a little unsure of how much we actually enjoyed it. Although, one thing we all agreed on was that the milkshakes were the star of the show. Straight perfection.

 Average Overall: 7.1

Milkshake: 9.0

Stop #3: Zesto Pizza and Grill (610-527-8500)

908 Conestoga Rd, Bryn Mawr, PA 19010

Right down the street from Bubba’s and Johnny’s sits a little delivery spot called Zesto. If you have ever driven down Conestoga Road, you’ve probably seen and smelled it. Known mostly for their pizza, Zestos has a strong following (for strictly pizza), but we decided to stay away from the classic pie and see how their cheesesteaks stack up. Logan insisted on ordering Zesto Fries. So, we ordered them because, let’s be honest, fries are never a faulty item to get (and nobody argues with Logan about food). I ran in and grabbed our food. Immediately, the smell that filled the air was the kind of smell that makes you forget your manners and completely inhale your meal. But once unwrapped, we saw a major problem: hardly any cheese. A cheesesteak without cheese is like a concert without music. A full on crisis. Still, we took our bites, and it was surprisingly not bad. Now, it wasn’t breathtaking, but I still wanted a second bite. The meat was tender, flavorful, and seasoned just right. Rio said the peppery flavor gave it a spectacular touch. If this sandwich were a person, it would be the quiet kid in class who has a freakishly cool talent. Lesson in life: never judge a cheesesteak by its cover. But here’s the thing, flavor alone couldn’t save it from its biggest flaw. Every single one of us agreed there was way too little cheese. It needed that glorious, gooey melt to tie it all together. Without it, the sandwich felt like it was missing its identity, like Bane without his mask. Overall, the steak was good. Not much else to it.

Overall Average: 7.0

Zesto Fries: 8.8

Stop #4: New Wayne Pizza (610-688-2301)
109 S Wayne Ave, Wayne, PA 19073

If it weren’t for longtime RABA legend (that’s “Radnor Baseball” for you uncultured readers of this fine publication) Coach Anthony Greco, we never would’ve even considered hitting up New Wayne Pizza in Wayne. Coach Greco is a certified treasure in the Radnor community. Except, of course, for the small detail that he’s now the head coach at Conestoga. We will forgive him for the time being. Anyways, the boys and I were hyped to try this local joint on South Wayne Ave. We ordered the usual: four steaks and a pepperoni pie. The food came out in about five minutes, a good sign, but things went downhill from there. First of all, the cheese wasn’t melted at all. Not even trying. I’ve seen more heat in a sophomore geometry class. Still, we powered through, expectations now lowered. The bread was thick, chewy, and spongy, just how I like it. The meat was solid, but sadly, this isn’t a steak sandwich review, it’s a cheesesteak review. When the “cheese” part of “cheesesteak” is missing in action, that’s a problem. Logan was personally offended that his sandwich had only two slices of American. Across the group, we all agreed the bread was good, but the cheese was tragic. Rio summed it up best by saying, “This cheesesteak is the definition of mid.” Which means not amazing, not awful, just aggressively average. At the end of the day, we were happy to support a local spot run by a friendly baseball guy. Although the cheesesteak wasn’t our favorite, we still had a great time and enjoyed some laughs amongst ourselves. 

 Overall Average: 5.7

Pizza: 6.7

Ultimately, the restaurant with the best cheesesteak is… Johnny’s! To be fair, going into this review, Johnny’s was the clear-cut favorite. The seasoned meat, melted cheese, and unique seeded roll are a trio reminiscent of MJ, Pippen, and Rodman. You simply cannot beat it. 

Overall Rankings

1st: Johnny’s 

2nd: Bubba’s

3rd: Zesto

4th: New Wayne

What’s next you might ask? Grubbin’ With the Gals? Or will there be a burger edition? Only time will tell!

Keep on Grubbin’ 

– Will Antik